Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Randomize
