i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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