You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
Randomize
