Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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