Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Randomize
