THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
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