See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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