he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
Randomize
