took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
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