Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
Randomize
