I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
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