She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
only you would photoshop your dick
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Randomize
