do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
