shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
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