i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Randomize
