Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
That accounts for only three of the penises
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Randomize