we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
Randomize
