She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Randomize
