Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Randomize
