hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
shit pants at work. discarded underwear.
just showed this text to the guy at west elm. luckily we did not stool ourselves in the midst of the ensuing hilarity. so you're commando now?
yep! most awkward part is that i was a few feet away from a client, talking and looking him in the eye. i've never stooled while looking someone directly in the eye.
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Randomize
