hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
Randomize
