i just bought a vibrator and the cashier says "have fun with that." i didnt realise what he said so i responded "you too." and then he gave me his number...
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
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