I would go down on you faster than GM stock
false alarm. still invincible.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
Randomize
