The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
Nicole vs. Life
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
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