super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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