id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
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