writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Randomize
