You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize
