What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
So he ended up having sex with me, but it was so awkward. When it was over, he went to the bathroom, and he came back and asked, "are you on your period or something? there's blood on my dick..." and i said, "well it was supposed to start today, nice surprise...i am so embarrassed." and he said ,"it's better than you queefing." and as soon as he said that, i queef the hardest and loudest i ever had.
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Randomize
