i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
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