my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Randomize
