It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
Randomize
