i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
Cover your peen. We're going out.
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
Randomize
