yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
Randomize
