Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
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