the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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