I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
