my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
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