I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
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