Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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