wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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