I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
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