hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
