I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
He shit in the fireplace
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
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