remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
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