Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
Randomize
