sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
Randomize
