Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Randomize