I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
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