I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
Randomize
