ugly people sure do ruin things
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
I'm going to write a horror movie. It's going to be called "Fat People on a Squeaky Bed" and it's going to feature me laying in bed last night listening to my overweight roommate and her fat boyfriend tossing and turning all night
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
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